OUCH!!! I’m awake

I fell asleep and had a dream. In the dream, I had just woken up. Now I’m so confused, up is white, black is east. How do I even know I’m really making this post. I KNOW! I’d go kiss that girl at the other table (I’m in a restaurant) and if I get away with it, then I’m definitely dreaming… Not now, after we conclude this UNIBUJA ish. —–»What do you mean ‘what UNIBUJA ish?’ Didn’t you read the last post? Okay, quick recap- non accreditation, protests,closure and now reactions from different peeps on the street.
Before we go into that though, news reaching me from my recon drones is that, after a meeting held by the senate,a new exam time table has been drawn which puts the exam date in December. Great shey? Not everybody thinks so. Here is a 500level engineering student with his take….(Let’s call him Ben)

Ben- ‘this whole situation is disgraceful,the first time we had this protest, the VC promised us facilities would be put in place and that he needed six months.this promise was made in March. This whole thing just stinks to high heavens,the corruption is so perverse. The uproar we would cause hasn’t even started. Now,they are saying they want to write exams abi?…oya now, let them come and write it, we are waiting for them… Abeg, for all you fashion conscious peeps out there, for all your couture needs call for Ben’s a la mode and …..’
Thank u Ben, see your head, you no pay for advert.
Davidplies also had some things to say.

Davidplies- ‘these people are just rams, I’m a 400 level student and I thought I will be graduating this year, but these people and their corrupt ways have put that in joepardy. I feel the pain of my affected colleagues and I’m solidly behind them’
Thank you David for shouting your opinions at us. And brother, its jeopardy.

Mr Ken P- ‘this whole situation is preposterous. The government is exhibiting a blatant disregard for the welfare of the leaders of tomorrow. Let’s call a spade a spade and not a shovel…there are many irregularities and grey areas in this case and until they are cleared off, we would always have problems. Anyways, na God get power.’

Amb. Preeta- ‘Gwags is on fire o. Soldiers are chasing students out of the hostels with whips. The whole situation is appalling indeed.’

One Igbo guy- ‘Bonanza bonanza !!! My broooda, no chelsea no football, abramov….’
Erm,sorry guy… We are not talking football right now…but uhm..thanks

Kalenz- ‘these people, na laundry kings dem be. They gave us a proper washing over eight months ago and we believed them. Dem wan come they use our eyes see road. No way. We would protest until goats cough like human beings. We know the entire student population is behind us… No shaking. HYPO- u go wipe o!’

Stewie Griffin- ‘you poor damn fools, you guys don’t know how to handle this situation. It’s nothing that a well placed missile can’t take of. Lock up the school? What the deuce!! Victory will be ours.’

Sleeky chi- ‘me, I’m tired of all these nonsense o. We are supposed to be leading the way in everything by virtue of being so close to the sit of power. But we find ourselves lagging behind because the sit of power is also the height of corruption.’

Riley Freeman-‘shii, niggers be tripping around me talking that dialogue trash- this is war boi. The po po are running around rounding up my hommies. They be thinkin that will make me talk… I aint no snitch. Take me jail-thats a holiday getaway for a real gee like me. And if that school gate don’t get opened, I piss on yo cat…u feel me?’

Peter Griffin- nyeee he he he he he, I like orange juice.

So with that off topic comment, I would say we have had enough. One sure thing we can take away from all these is that corruption has a huge hand in this and until we eradicate it,we are going nowhere fast.
To my colleagues affected by this, please do not despair,there’s a reason why everything happens. God still has you in his plans so just keep ballin… Oh and stewie, violence is not always the answer.

So there you have it. Quick disclaimer- all characters that featured in this post are real. The comments are real too…. Well real-ish…

Now, to find out if this has just been a dream. Oh good, the girl is still there. kissing time I guess. Here I go………………………………………………..

OUCH! I’m awake.

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6 thoughts on “OUCH!!! I’m awake

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